Ready to Stop Fighting

Thank you, Jenny, The Bloggess for sharing this last night.

Ya know how sometimes the universe sends you a sign and tells you exactly the thing you need to hear?

Well, thats what this blog post was to me last night.

I read it and re-read it.

I cried harder each time. 

I needed to hear that I was wanted, broken or not.

Her words caused my soul to crumble and shook me to the core.

You're not alone.

I'm still working up the courage for a real, honest, deep post.

I'm not going to lie, the last few months have been a tremendous struggle.

There have been a lot of sleepless nights, even more tears...

But I am ready to be done.

Done fighting and ready to live!

Really?

So, I have to admit, after hitting "PUBLISH" on my mission statement post last night, I had a bit of a panic attack.

Did I really, I mean REALLY, just commit to a year of no (limited) spending?

REALLY?

I asked Hubs...

"What did I just do?"

"You committed to something."

He said simply.

I sighed.

Yeah, I did.

Darn it!

So, its done. And I'm gonna do it.  And I intend to learn a lot by doing this.

I hope to learn to be a little more self-sufficient.

Obviously, learn to use my sewing machine. ::blush::

I don't want to be a slave to "style" but still be stylish.

Become more conscious of my budget and more creative with my wardrobe.

I hope this creativity will bleed into all aspects of my life.

This is going to be a whole new era of frugatlity, creativity and style.

Here we go!

Time to make an ADVENTURE!

(Almost) Monday Morning Confessional

Yup.

I am THAT mom.  

Today is a holiday;

Hubs and I are both off...

And Goose will be going to daycare.

I'm a terrible mother.
My child will be scarred for life...

Or will she?

Okay, so here is the deal.

We have it worked out that Goose is only in daycare two days a week. Monday and Wednesday.  The rest of the time she is with family and weekends are spent at home.  I know we don't spend as much time with her as we "should" (what does that even mean, anyway?) but, honestly, the thing is... daycare ain't cheap! We spend quite a bit just for her to go on those two days and we have to pay whether she is there are not.  It sucks.  But it is what it is.

Besides...

Goose loves "school."
She loves her friends.
She loves to make crafts.
She loves the attention.

And, quite frankly, she needs the interaction.
Craves it.
I need her to have the interaction.

Also,
Hubs and I rarely spent time alone.
Together.
During the day.

So... we are gonna take advantage of it!

Call me a bad mom, I don't care.
I know Goose will be happier at school than hangin' at home while Hubs and I catch up on the cleaning.
'Cuz we didn't do much all weekend.
And its hard for all of us, being cooped up when the weather is bad.
It's just better for ALL of us this way.
Trust me.  

And here is the real confession...

I'm not even gonna let myself feel guilty about it.

Not in the slightest.

Don't be judgey...

PS - Check out the AH-mazing vintage jacket I snagged this weekend at Fun Junk. Actually, its a suit but the skirt is WAY small. 

The coat fits purrrfect. 

This is just a bad photo booth pic, but you should get the idea.

I have a Secret...

Pics via
www.postsecret.com

ETA - Hubs left this message on my Twitter, "He's not hoping or waiting for that girl to come back, he's hoping and waiting for her to realize the greatness of the woman she's become." I love him so much.